A few days ago, two of my dogs encountered a porcupine which protected itself by swinging its tail and sticking quills into their noses. When I first saw the dogs I ached at the thought of pulling the quills out. My husband reminded me, “the quills are hollow- cut the tip – the barb under the skin will be relaxed.” After pouring hydrogen peroxide on the spot for cleansing and Anbesol to relieve the pain; I took pliers and removed each quill without a whimper from the dog but received a thankful wag and loving nudge when finished.

The heart picture represents your heart with five quills representing some of the hurts you’ve allowed to penetrate. Let’s go over our hurt removal steps, again. Pick one quill – example- your spouse made a hurtful comment. If this cannot be healed by assertively responding back; nip the quill by taking three deep breaths. With each breath say why this hurt and you’re not going to allow this again. Blow the air out of your mouth and release the heat and the hurt. Promise not to remind yourself (harp) on this again. You have more constructive, important things to do and think about. Our next step – cleanse the wound: remind yourself of what you’ve done well and ways you can shield yourself from being hurt again. Now apply the “imaginary” Anbesol with what has shown you love or beauty. For example, your pet giving affection to you or hearing a bird singing outside (find joy to replace your hurt.)

Now choose crayon, pencils, a palette knife and acrylics or scissors and paper (whatever tools you have or like to use) – make your heart. Place the finished heart on your refrigerator or bulletin board and on top of each spot where the quill used to be – place a small heart with the word that represents the remedy (Baby’s Smile). When you think of other joys you can place them as reminders of all you have to be thankful for. But if you start to think about the hurt go back to the thought of the joy. The hurt is not worthy of your time – the solution is! Love yourself first and love mirrors back in some nature form.

Also ask yourself, like the dogs, did you place fear or hurt in the person throwing the quills or do they have a deep hurt which caused them to lash out at you because you were a “safe” target and they needed to vent their pain?

P.S. If your child has been bullied or had a bad experience at school – help them try this exercise.

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